Found Love In Me

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"I'm not afraid to walk away with God I'm free cause I found love in me..." 

As I get ready to turn a new age this week I find myself reflecting back on one of the most impactful years I have had age wise. I learned how to love more selflessly. I graduated from college :). I experienced what it's like to move away from your best friends. I've learned how to be in long distance friendships. I've learned about God's grace and how faithful he teaches me to be. Whew those life lessons will forever hold a special place with me but I had three things that were impactful for me so I wanted to share them with you.  

1. Always be real with yourself! When you trust yourself you start making all the right choices.- I feel like this year in my life I have desired to be surrounded by real, honest and transparent people. Like my heart has craved it without even knowing it. I feel like I've learned this life lesson really well from my friend Corinne this past summer. I doubted myself so much that I didn't even believe that greatness existed in me. She challenged me to trust myself enough to follow whatever I was feeling without being led by emotions. If it doesn't feel right then don't do it. 

2. Make yourself happy before anyone else.- I feel like I mess this up all the time! For the longest time I didn't know what happiness was because I lived to please everyone with every decision that I made. I'm thankful that TaNeisha challenges me in this area of my life. I'm grateful that she always tells me if it makes me happy then no one's opinion should matter. I think I learned this year when you start living for your happiness instead of the world thinks that life actually starts to look brighter. 

3. Don't forget that growth and change is a great thing.- I was stretched so much this year. Like it was so uncomfortable I was stretched so much. Slowly through the process I began to see God's grace through it all. When he stretches you it is because greater things are coming. Got heartache? Got sleepless nights? Transitioning to a new job? All of those things are great things!! That guy/girl that left wasn't worthy of your love God has someone better prepared. Sleepless nights just means that God is longing for you to give him your attention. A new job is just a perfect way for you to show you how faithful he really is. The hard part? Trusting him and his timing. I was so sad all the time because I wasn't trusting God with certain areas of my life. I doubted his direction for me. How can I say Jeremiah 29:11 is my favorite scripture when I wasn't fully trusting his plan for me or my future? So the place that I was in that was uncomfortable birthed great things for me. 

So how do I sum up year 23? All I can say is that I'm grateful for the journey. I'm grateful that I learned how to be comfortable being me. I'm grateful for my family, my friends, and the awesome God I serve. Year 24 will be great because God is great. 

Dear God, 
Thank you for fixing me. Thank you for healing me. Thank you for showing me love in all of my scars. I'm grateful for the time I'm getting to spend knowing and seeing how faithful you really are. Thank you for showing me love in me. 

Signed, 
Another year down

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